Well Ms. Alba , I’ve given birth and  it was pretty painful.  Bad cramps are what we get when watching you pretend your way through Fantastic Four (really, who thought blond hair, blue eyes and fish lips would look good on her?)

Ok, anyway, my point was – don’t listen to her.  She claimed she worked out so hard after having her baby to get in shape for a liquor ad campaign that she cried. Oh boo hoo. I cry damn near every day at the gym and I damn sure don’t have a liquor company paying me to be in photos with their product.  Sorry, I’m digressing again…so she claims she worked her butt literally to tears, and the creatives still airbrushed 20% of her body away.

Just a few nips and tucks: shoulder definition, boobs pushed up, lips plumper, arms defined, waste thinner, smoother front on her shorts, thinner legs...

Plus, there was the whole Sweden nuetrality thing.

What have we learned:  Jessica Alba seems like she might not be all there.  My opinion: child birth hurts more than bad cramps, workouts are supposed to be gruelling (no pain, no gain or something like that), I need to get a liquor company to pay for me to be in their photos, and no matter how hard we workout someone will find a way to airbrush us better.